Are you a vampire?

The vampire myth is alive and well in popular culture, in novels, film and television.

A vampire is a creature that sucks life-blood – the life-giving energy running in our veins – until its victim is a husk, a dead shell.

Every day, women have to contend with the danger of ordinary vampires.

Artistic portrait of a young African woman

Are you allowing others to suck the life-blood out of you by not setting clear boundaries? Are you being a vampire to yourself by doing everything BUT the things that feed your soul?

How well do you protect your energy? Your physical, emotional, psychological, mental energy?

As women, we have been taught to do, do, do and give, give give, putting the needs and desires of others first. We have not been taught the importance of self-care to our well-being.

I remember taking a tantra workshop where the teacher shared a powerful image with us that has stuck with me. In a relationship, there are 3 cups: your own cup, the other person’s cup, and in between, the cup of the relationship.  We are meant to fill the cup of the relationship from our own abundance, and dip into the middle cup when we need it. We aren’t meant to fill or drain each other’s cups… (And mothers would do well to remember those safety instructions on the plane: the adult must put on her oxygen mask first…)

We have not learned to fill our own cup so we can give freely and generously to others from our overflow.

If you are running on empty, your inner light is dim from lack of fuel.  You are exhausted, probably resentful, and not in a fully loving space, either for yourself or for others. If you don’t take the best care of yourself, who will? And if you get sick from running on empty, how will you be there for those you love?

As women, we need to learn to protect our energy by setting healthy boundaries.  We need to learn to fill up our cups with self-care, let go of the unimportant and ask for help.  We need to learn to carve out and protect the essential time to do what feeds our inner light. Only then can we give the best of ourselves.  This is a difficult lesson to learn, as it goes against centuries of conditioning.

Protect you energy. Nurture yourself first, and your generous, loving nature will flow with riches to give.


<<I’ve spent a lifetime studying self-care. And I’ve come to the conclusion that good self-care is the single most important aspect of our health, period.>>

Dr. Christiane Northrup, women’s health expert







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